Friday, July 29, 2011

genap da sebulan hari neyh ..silence means "avoiding" or "forgetful" stage ..hereby, i cant even hope for more. im capable of nothing. im useless, helpless..ntahla..xthu nk ckp cm ner da..hold back then..bg masa? it could take  forever...i'll be right here then..in the mean time i'll be the manipulative psychotic bitch..

when u saw wat happened around you, to be imagined that u are going to be in that position later, just freaked me out. thought that it would be different but yet theres isnt any good role model present around me that would make me think otherwise..therefore, i have to take into consideration of all the things to just being able to feel that "happiness", to even let a small part of "happiness" filled in inside me, it aint easy anymore..careful..tooo C-A-R-E-F-U-L..i know it could harm me somehow..wat else i could wish for? klo da ending 4 every relationship is like a hell, wat worth for giving a try? 

for over 4 years i kept thinking isnt would be totally different if he never let me go in the 1st place? i regret since then...all my nightmare arose n arose ...one after another..when a lil thing could change u this much, so how the heck do u think that much concerned of you will affect me? no la beb..even since then, you take a good care of me, agrhrh, it will still remain the same.just the same.

u told me "nape sush sgt nk terima, keras sgt haty tuh", well, its for a good reason definitely, a lesson still a lesson, its not about you and me, but its only about me now..u have to be selfish, yes i am selfish..i am that bitch who like to do what i think though, i need to loose control. i have the whole time to think and take care of him, but in the end its nothing, i got nothing, wat he gave me? heart ache every now n then..lolololo

i acknowledge everything around me more now, "if he has got u so much hurt,is there any guarantee u wont feel that again from that mankind?"..hahaha..u gotta be kidding me..its the main ingredients of a complete love story..why bother so much...u got long way to go..:)

stay on the road, n be sure that nothings comes in between that will ever blind you to stay on the track


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